This is the segment of the show where I appropriate whatever hashtags I may see as the Armageddon plies deep space. I employ these “found objects” of hashtags as a means of transmitting my terror.
Did you know that I haven’t paid federal income tax for the past twenty years? Mm hm: I screwed the IRS out of untold amounts of money and I just laugh and laugh and laugh at the Justice Department as they frantically rub their limp little wiener, trying to get a hard on. Yeah, they’re not so eager anymore to smooth their ties and clear their throats and run their mouths during my show.
I enjoyed crushing the Justice Department’s fraudulent idiot head with one punch.
I am America’s Senior Comedian. Thank you for your kind attention in this matter.