There’s a thing on my car, you know where one of the front struts attaches to the body? Some sort of strut mount or something? My mechanic says it needs replacing because it just moves around and that is what causes that clunking sound when I drive down dirt roads.

So I need that three hundred million dollars, thanks. And I need that full refund from the IRS. Let’s try to pick up the glacial pace around here, okay?

Your jurisdiction lost, fair and square. There’s no need for pouting and keying my car and calling me a terriss. It doesn’t look very good.

I am America’s Senior Comedian. Thank you for your kind attention in this matter.