Meet The Man Who’ll Issue Gay Marriage Licenses Even If Kim Davis Tells Him Not To

U.S. District Judge David Bunning ordered Davis released only after Mason and his colleagues began issuing licenses. Bunning has warned the clerk not to interfere with her deputies issuing marriage licenses to all legally eligible couples.

Kentucky law does not require a clerk’s signature on the license to be valid but, rather, “the signature of the county clerk or deputy clerk issuing the license,” according to The New York Times. Rowan County Attorney Cecil Watkins told the Times that the licenses issued without Davis’s assent would be valid, but Davis’ attorney, Mathew Staver, said he believes licenses issued with his client’s approval would be invalid.

That means that the county clerk need not personally sign each and every last marriage license; the licenses are valid even with a deputy clerk’s signature. It’s okay if the clerk takes a vacation, that is.

But the licenses are issued or not at the direction of the clerk. Deputies have no power to direct the issuance of marriage licenses. It’s almost like this federal judge has no idea what he’s talking about. This idiot judge lacks the legal authority to change Kentucky law by instructing deputy clerks to issue marriage licenses under their own nonexistent authority. Judges are traffic cops. They are able to direct that first this car proceed then that car proceed, but they are unable to direct that the cars levitate and achieve warp velocity and travel to Mars. What does this judge do in the privacy of his chambers? Dress up in his robe and wave a wand around and command that the seas part? Self-aggrandize much? Do you brag on your Loserbook page that you’re a federal judge now, hoping to impress your old friends from high school? No one’s impressed. You hired on with an idiot organization. You should have become a state judge instead.

The federal jurisdiction is the most corrupt, stupid, ignorant, broken piece of trash that one could even draw up on paper. It appears to know absolutely nothing about law. The idiot organization indicts people every day for crimes they could not have even theoretically committed. It’s the town ding dong. How much time would the reasonable person spend listening to the town ding dong?

It’s an idiot jurisdiction. Ignore it.

I am America’s Senior Comedian. Thank you for your kind attention in this matter.